Due Date....

Today was the day that our little Destiny was due. It's been an interesting week. The tender mercies of the Lord were at work in my life. I was asked to teach the RS lesson today. The lesson was about The Savior, the atonement, and the resurrection. It was really a good thing to have that to focus on rather than just the sadness I feel from not having a baby to hold. Back in November when people would say the things they say (things like, 'aren't you grateful for the gospel...it makes these things easier', and 'aren't you grateful that she'll always be a part of your familiy') I wondered about myself. I didn't think I found much comfort in the gospel teachings that we'd have her a part of our family forever (what I really wanted was to have her here and now!). However, as time has gone by, I've realized that perhaps I was carried by the testimony I have of those things. When I look at others and the ways they deal with the loss of a baby through stillbirth I realize that there is a difference. I'm so grateful that I had that lesson to focus on this week. It gave me a lot of comfort....and it helped me to focus on the right thing. I pondered and prayed over whether or not I should share the things I've learned about myself from this experience - and in the end I did. I hope it made a difference in someone else's life.