The Art of Mending (Elizabeth Berg)

I've been feeling siatic pain in my back again. Usually that is a result of stress. I couldn't figure out what I would be stressed about. I decided perhaps the best remedy would be a night of true relaxation - so I found a book and read from about 5:00 until 10:00 (Ah! Blessed caving!) The book is a quick read. I read it at quite a leisurely pace and somewhere in there I made dinner and read with Peirce for half an hour or so.

This book reminded me of the book called They Love You, They Love Me Not (Rabie-Azoory) Rabie-Azoory's book is the science behind what Elizabeth Berg's book is about. She tells a story of 3 siblings, Laura, Steve and Caroline who have to face the very different childhood one of them had. It's quite intriguing to read about how they respond and how they come around to the truth.

It was really interesting to me to think about how Laura and Steve were totally oblivious to the way Caroline was treated. I think a lot of people would be surprised that this could happen - but truthfully, I think most people are so caught up in their own lives that they're really quiet unaware of everyone around them - even their siblings. Even the parent who saw the mistreatment go on did nothing about it. How sad is that? It is probably most troubling because of how common it is. In the book Laura starts to come around and realize what Caroline is saying could be possible because of an experience her husband, Pete had while growing up. He tells her the story and she says (p. 110):

"Well, this is just....I'm astonished! It doesn't fit with them."

"It doesn't fit with what you know. Knew."

I swallowed hard, said nothing. But then, "You know, Pete, my dad just died. Why did you tell me that? I don't have room for anything else. Why did you tell me that?
He put his arms around me, spoke softly into my ear. "Because something is not everything. You know? And because nobody knows what goes on in other families, because families lie about themselves to other people. Not only to other people but to one another. And to themselves."

I like what this book did with my thinking about people. It made me think about some individuals I know and love - but sometime have a hard time being around. I think a lot of the issues I have with them are due to unresolved issues they have with their upbringing and their family - and it all made me want to be a little more understanding and show a little more patience and kindness.

As a total aside - one thing I loved in this book was the narrator, Laura's, interest in sewing. In case you can't quite figure out what the cover is - it's a cupboard full of fabric. She talks about going into fabric stores, buying a beautiful piece of cloth off a bolt, taking it apart and turning it into something beautiful. She talks about hoarding fabric. She talks about just sitting and looking at the beautiful fabric, and about the eccentric people working in the fabric store she frequented. Somehow it was all so good for my soul!! I feel a sewing spree coming on.....

Oh....and my back feels much better. No more siatic pain.

Weird how that works.