Family of 5? 4? 6?

Lately I've been thinking a lot about Destiny. I think it's probably because when I sub often the children ask about the necklace I wear every day. My mom and dad gave it to me after Destiny died. It is a heart with five little diamonds in it, each one representing each person in our family: Allen, my, Jill, Peirce and Destiny. Now that last little diamond represents Destiny and our next loved and lost baby.

Tonight Allen looked after taking the kids to swimming so I could have a much needed rest. After my nap I got on google reader and was trolling a few blogs. I was introduced to Design Mom by a couple of Allen's cousins. The author if the blog recently had a baby and has had people write birth stories. I browsed through a few until this one caught my attention. All the stories got me a little teary as I think of the baby we recently lost, as well as Destiny. Destiny would have been by 3 now, enjoying nursery and life as a pre-schooler. It's still amazing to me how tender those feelings. It's funny the little things that it makes difficult: like what number do you put on your wall? And will I always cringe and quietly whisper, "Sorry Destiny" when I answer "two" to the question of how many children I have?

Probably.

This is one of my favorite family pictures. My sister made it for me. When she made it she told me that the pink balloon represented Destiny. I think it's interesting that she actually put two balloons in the picture. I always thought this last baby we were having was going to be a boy. Now he's represented in the blue balloon.