Happy Mother's Day!

Years ago, when I started a streak of walking every day, I did it because it seemed like if I missed a day, suddenly one day missed turned into 7 or 10 or more. It seems like it's the same with blogging. It's been 8 days since I've blogged. I'm going to get back to working on a streak.

Today was Mother's Day and it was a great day. It was an unusual Mother's Day because we had nowhere we could go thanks to the pandemic - but that was okay. I talked to my mom in the morning and had a great visit. The rest of the day was great too. 

I know that a lot of people have trouble with Mother's Day. They don't like the "pedestal-ing". They feel inadequate. I've never really felt upset by people talking about how perfect their mothers are or were. I guess I really don't believe that they were that perfect and maybe it's also because I'm okay with my imperfections. Perhaps it was because I never felt like my mother felt that way. She just seemed to enjoy the day. It wasn't until I became an adult and realized some of the women around me truly hated Mother's Day. Don't get me wrong. I had those awkward years where I felt like a fraud taking the the flower or the chocolate at church when I wasn't a mother. There is some kind of strange idea at church that all women are mothers. They're not and the push we have to seem to try to believe that is weird. All that being said, I love my children's and husband's efforts to make it a lovely day for me. Their efforts are appreciated. 

This morning I woke up to a gift bag of fun beauty products from Allen, which was quickly followed by a "Welcome to Mom Spa" from Jill. She brushed my hair, massaged my scalp, gave me a pedicure and a back massage while the boys made breakfast. What a breakfast it was! Scrambled eggs, granola, yogurt and apple turnovers. Yum! 

Allen made an amazing lunch of French Onion soup and garlic toast. Yum!! I spent the afternoon reading and relaxing. Peirce got me some new oven mitts. He's been disturbed lately by my ability to burn my inner arms as I take things out of the oven. Really, it isn't the oven mitts fault, but I appreciate his concern!

Tonight we had a French style dinner. I'm starting to really enjoy this Sunday tradition. Really, it isn't that different than a regular dinner, we just do it in courses. I like having a salad course first. We all eat many more vegetables as a result. And of course, my favorite is always the cheese course. I love cheese!

We had a "Zoom Devotional" tonight with Elder Evanson where he talked about motherhood. He tied it in with the nature of God and how mothers give us physical birth so that we can one day return to God and God gives us spiritual birth. We can't get back without both.

Day 54 Drive!

Sometimes it seems like this is all I do. Drive to seminary. Drive to school. Drive to the pool. Drive to the church. Drive. Drive. Drive. 

Good thing I love my car. 

Christmas 2015

GIn November, as a last minute pull the rabbit out of the hat and make a good RS activity night, we had a class on planning for a stress-free Christmas. Turned out to be the best thing ever. I think from now on, in November, I will be sure to take some time to think about what I really enjoy and focus on that for the Christmas season. There is so much to do that sometimes I get bogged down in to do lists and don't enjoy this season. This year I didn't do that. I enjoyed the music more. I enjoyed the social gatherings more. I enjoyed my family more.

We have a few traditions. We go to the First Presidency broadcast the first Sunday in December, then we go to our friend's, the Hawryluks. We had my work party, Allen's office party, a RS party (missed that one, although I did help organize it....it conflicted with my work party) our ward party, and we usually help serve at the other ward's Christmas party. I even went to my friend, Kim's, Christmas  concert. It was amazing music! I went alone...and that was just fine because I gave up all the expectations (it is okay to do some seasonal stuff without family!) and just did what I enjoyed. It was great! We went to Storybook Theatre's Christmas play.....loved that. We usually go to the Hudsons for a carol singing night, but this year they didn't have it. We would have missed it anyway because that was the day we celebrated Christmas with Grandma.

 

We had Christmas Eve at home. Usually, we go to the nativity pageant, but it was really cold, so we just enjoyed ourselves at home instead. I learned the joy of teenagers on Christmas morning: they slept until 8:00!! This year we didn't seem to do as many presents, but it was still great. Just perfect actually. We had The NAckroyds over for dinner the afternoon of Christmas Day. A lovely day!

I always have a long list of housework things to catch up on over breaks from school. This year I decided to just do one little thing each day to make our house a little nicer.....something I had been neglecting. It worked! Usually I have these long lists and never quite get sound to any of t because I really don't want to spend my whole time cleaning. That makes me feel a little bitter. This one little thing each day seemed to work much better. I might even continue it after school starts up again! I also did a little bit of school work - even though people like to lecture on how important it is to leave all work behind. Just a little bit now and then is what I did...and I think that will make going back to work even better. And the truth is, I don't hate the work I do. I enjoy it.....so why not?!

Peirce got a pet sitting job over the break so we have spent a lot of time driving him to the house of pets. They have a dog named Draco, two cats and a bearded dragon. I has been a good responsibility for him. Good $$ too, I would say!

Jill did a fair bit of homework and studying (still finishing up English 20!) She has some swim practices, worked a few days at Brokin Yolk, and did a lot of fun friend things. She pretty much never stops!

We tried to immerse Bobby into his first Christmas experience. He wasn't that into it. I decided I would just invite, and after that, not worry about it if he didn't participate. It was, however, very interesting to have someone who has n emotional connections to Christmas. That is a subject for a whole 'nother post!

I also spent a lot of time reading. I hoped to do a book a day (inspired by Donalyn Miller) but I got stuck in a couple books I wasn't that enthusiastic about. Didn't quite meet my goal, but I did get some great books read! I also exercised every day over the break. Every day!! It has been fabulous.

Looking back, we really did a lot. It didn't stress me the same as other years though. I think there are a few reasons. I decided to be conscious about simply enjoying the moment. I decided to not worry about expectations, especially when it comes to gift giving. I just did what felt right, not what I figured others expected me to do. I chose to not do some things that I just don't enjoy. I filled my days with things I love, rather than duties. 

I lived to feel the joy.

Really, I think that is what Christmas is all about.

Happy Easter!

Whoa. I haven't posted much since February.

February is report card month. Somehow that whole month just gets simply overwhelming. Apparently it took me a month to recover.

Instead of trying to go back, I will just begin today.

Our Easter weekend has been lovely. Allen and Peirce have planned for a long time that they'd go to conference to attend the Priesthood session once Peirce turned 12. Uncle Nathan got some tickets to conference so they decided to jump on the opportunity and go. A Boys Club win!

 

Look at those two handsome guys!! I just love this picture.



 

 

 

Jill and I had our own little Easter dinner for two. Yum!

We even found a few Easter treats. We don't do a lot of treats at Easter in our house, but it's always nice to have a bit of chocolate! Too bad we couldn't get the picture in focus.

 

Jill and I stayed home and got to watch all four sessions of conference. This is my favorite weekend of the year - especially when things work out so that nothing gets in the way of conference. I find it renewing and relaxing. We had a wonderful weekend!

 

 

Life is Hard

Tomorrow is a new day
As long as we show love
Beauty will reign supreme
Beginnings will present themselves
You will conquer

Keeping faith
Always shows that
You will
Live strong
And rise from the challenges

I just finished reading Awake and Dreaming. Breaks my heart.

Fabulous Day and a Lovely Night

Today has been a great day. I love PD days. I love being able to have more time with the people I work with. They are great people. I also love learning. Today we got to spend some time working too. We are changing report cards slightly and so we did some work to prepare for that.

Tonight I took the kids to their mutual activity. I had a wonderful evening. I made a phone call to the bank that I have been dreading doing for a while (why do banks get my stomach all in knots?) I said a prayer, then did it - and it went famously. I would even say the guy I talked to was nice! After that, I did a  little marking and then a lot of reading. There is nothing like sitting and reading for an hour or two straight.

I read a book called Awake and Dreaming. It is tearing up my heart!!

Happy Cinco de Mayo!

A radio station here decided to start an annual Cinco de Mayo tradition: chihuahua races!

Allen wanted to take Chico. I thought he was crazy. The kids were on his side. I decided to close my eyes and wave them good bye.

Apparently, he wasn't even the worst behaved chihuahua there!

There were about 10 or 12 dogs.  They all got along great. The highlight was when a black lab walked by and all the chihuahuas started barking at it--you don't belong here, go away.  Chico had a great time and the kids had an even better time.

 

Chico is second from the end, on the right.

 

 

I'm thinking it looks like the humans had much more fun than the dog had.

Poor Chico. He gets so stressed!

 

 

Happy Birthday Peirce!

Happy birthday to the best boy ever. Peirce is a great kid. He is a good friend to everyone, he is full of gratitude, he is very creative, he loves to read, loves Scouts, loves swimming. He loves times of quiet and solitude and still loves to socialize with his friends and his cousins. He is just an all round great guy to hang out with!

He turns 12 this year and is very excited to take on his new responsibilities as a deacon at church.

Jill and Her Friends

Jill is such a fun girl. Every week, at church, she has a gaggle of friends around....and often they are under 8.

Me sneaking in a shot during church. Shhhh. Don't tell!

This was after stake conference? Jill is visiting with her friend...but of course her shorter fans aren't far away! :) So cute.

Proper Words

Allen is away in Edmonton with Jill at a meet. Things worked out so that Allen ended up having a little time with his niece and nephew while his sister and brother-in-law were out. He really gets a kick out of those kids (kids in general?) and so was totally up for it.

He got all set up to read his 5 year old niece a story. He got a bunch of pillows to make them comfy.

Allen: Are you all snuggled in?

Niece: It's just that I don't snuggle with random strangers.

Allen: I'm no random stranger! I'm your favorite Uncle Allen!

Niece: I would just rather you didn't use that word snuggle.

What a kid! She went on to explain that she is much more comfortable with the word cozy.

Schooled!

Oh, then she snuggled right in, with her head in his shoulder, to read the story.

Funny girl.

Jr. High Orientation

It's that time of year. Orientations at schools for new students. For us, it was Junior High orientation tonight for Peirce.

My little boy is going to be in Jr High?!

It was actually quite fun. I remember it  being like this when we went with Jill too. We went from room to room to see activities and talk with teachers of different subjects. Peirce is really ready for this step. He is excited about choosing options. He even talked with each of the teachers as we went into each room (well, except the drama teacher because she had some kids actually practicing a play). It was a good time.

One thing I'm grateful for is that as each step has come, my kids have been really excited to take that step. Whether it was kindergarten, moving from primary to the youth program at church, junior high or high school - it has been a good experience each time. Here's hoping that continues!

Smuggle Mom

Jill's coach calls people who don't know the swimming life "smuggles". In Harry Potter a muggle is a person who lacks any sort of magical ability and was not born into the magical world. In our life, a smuggle is someone who doesn't understand the magic of the swimming life.

I'm a smuggle. I'll admit it. I had no idea what we were getting into when we started this swimming life. I can't keep track of swim times like some parents do. I don't know all the terms, and I often say the wrong things to my kids about how to get a better time (just move your arms faster!)

However, I am oftensimply amazed at the beauty and wisdom involved in the demanding life of a swimmer.

This week, most kids are being lazy, playing with their Christmas toys, eat bad (good?) food, and other fun stuff. That's not a bad thing. It isn't what swim kids do though. Swim kids are at swim camps!

Jill has had twice a day workouts. 8-10 am and then again 2-4:30 pm.
Peirce has just had once a day workouts - and that's enough. He sure sleeps better.

Sometimes I think the demands of swimming life are way too much. I suppose that is the smuggle in me coming out. We drag Peirce to the pool now and then. Jill doesn't require any dragging though. She loves it. She works hard and follows the instructions her coaches give quite closely. She's also learned the dangers of staying up too late. One 3 am night (New Year's Eve) has made this a double-hard week. She's survived though. She even went to YW when she felt way too tired (it's amazing what washing one's hair will do to pick you up though). Her motto is that she does hard things.

I think that's a good motto.

For me the hard things are getting out of bed before my preferred time of 9 am, the driving, the preparing food, and the waiting around at the pool.

I probably shouldn't complain. It's great reading time!

New Year's Eve

What a night! We ended the year off with a bang!

Peirce and I worked at a hockey game. Did you know they can do fireworks right on the ice?! That was pretty cool.

After we went and found Allen and then subsequently found a restaurant that had tables available. It was a bit of an eye opener for Peirce: loud music, DJ, fancified people, champagne (well, not for us) and lots of noisy people. They handed out party hats and noisemakers for the countdown. Fun!

These are terribly grainy pictures....apparently I need a better phone. 

Jill on the other hand, had five parties in one night:

1. Shop and have a friend over to get ready for the dance.

2. Go to the before dance party at a boy's house.

3. Go to the dance.

4. Go to the after dance party at another boy's house.

5. Have a friend sleepover (attempt to watch a movie first....which didn't last long. Valiant effort though!)

Translation: That meant a bunch of driving for Allen. I'm always amazed at the number of kids looking for rides on nights like tonight. I wonder what their parents did for New Year's Eve? Oh well! It is good bonding time....a win for Allen.

Now bring on 2014!

Choose Kind!

Today, for me, is Choose Kind Day. It's a saying, from a great book I read, called Wonder.

When I was pregnant with Destiny I felt like she was a gentle little girl. I still feel strongly that she was very kind. After she was born, I felt a strong desire to be a little kinder, especially to children. I have decided that today is my own official Choose Kind day, in remembrance of her.

I'm so blessed to have people who remember her birthday every year. She would have been six years old this year. Maybe she would have been coming to school with me and been in kindergarten or grade one this year. Imagine how different life would be if we had a six year old in our family!




I also got flowers from my cousin. I was doing fine until she showed up to tell me she loves me!! Lots of tears. They're grateful tears though.



I remember, when she was first born, how hard it was to talk about her. I couldn't do it without crying. People said it would get easier with time. I couldn't imagine it ever getting easier - but it really does. I can even accept now that maybe it all happened for a good reason. She brought something into our fmaily that couldn't have happened any other way.  I do feel blessed for having gone through the experience.

We love you Destiny. You will always be real to me.

“What is REAL?” asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. “Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?”
“Real isn’t how you are made,” said the Skin Horse. “It’s a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.”
“Does it hurt?” asked the Rabbit.
“Sometimes,” said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. “When you are Real you don’t mind being hurt.”
“Does it happen all at once, like being wound up,” he asked, “or bit by bit?”
“It doesn’t happen all at once,” said the Skin Horse. “You become. It takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept.
“Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.”
“I suppose you are real?” said the Rabbit. And then he wished he had not said it, for he thought the Skin Horse might be sensitive. But the Skin Horse only smiled.
“The Boy’s Uncle made me Real,” he said. “That was a great many years ago; but once you are Real you can’t become unreal again. It lasts for always.”
The Rabbit sighed. He thought it would be a long time before this magic called Real happened to him. He longed to become Real, to know what it felt like; and yet the idea of growing shabby and losing his eyes and whiskers was rather sad. He wished that he could become it without these uncomfortable things happening to him.

  The Velveteen Rabbit (emphasis my own)

 

This passage really touches me because some people are really uncomfortable talking about the whole Destiny story. They aren't sure what to say when it comes to a baby that is dead. I'm okay talking about it, but I try not to make other people feel uncomfortable. As ugly as the whole situation is, it is beautiful to me.



Children

The other day I was having a conversation with a friend at work. She had mentioned that she has a sister that is some twenty years younger than her and so I asked her about that. It's quite unusual for people to have children that far apart in age. She said that her sister was born after she had left home to go to school. She said that her mother's friends and acquaintances weren't exactly excited or supportive of her in this pregnancy. Quite the opposite. She went on to talk about what a blessing it had been in her family to have young children around all the time. Whether it was her younger sister, or her own children, or her siblings children - but most of her life there were young children around her family. She said she has very little patience or empathy who people who have anything but positive words for the idea of having a child around. Her words really touched my heart and made me wonder if this is one of the little secret ingredients that makes our school such a great place - people here really love children.

I keep little reminders around for myself to keep those same thoughts. When Destiny was stillborn, and when I had another miscarriage, I remember having a strong desire to always be kind to children, especially my own. I loved this story at this past General Conference about a mom who had lost her child in a fabric store. She was getting more and more worried and calling loudly for her child. One lady had a thought that maybe the child was scared to come out listening to the fear in his mother's voice. She decided to walk around and call for the boy with a quiet voice, "Jason, it's okay to come out. Are you here?" She finally did find him in amongst the bolts of fabric. It really reminded me of my decision to go back to teaching and my desire to be kind.

Today at school one of my student's asked me why I decided to become a teacher. It was while I was in the middle of a reading rant, so I suspect he expected me to say I became a teacher because I love reading. That's part of it, I suppose. First I told him I'd answer that question later. Then I paused and said, "Do you really want to know?" Of course, everyone was up for a story then. So I told them about how I had always wanted to be a teacher because I pretty much always liked school, and so I went to University and became one. And I loved it. Then I had a baby that I was soooo crazy about and I just wanted to stay home and be a mom after that, but I did have different jobs here and there, and they were okay. But mostly I loved being a mom. Then I had another baby, and I wanted to keep being a mom because now I had TWO BABIES that I was really crazy about! Then I had another baby....and I told them that that baby died. (I really had everyone's attention then) I told them that I cried for about a year (they laughed at that, because it sounds ridiculous....little do they know), and then I decided I needed to do something different with my life. I thought and thought and thought and decided I would like to become a teacher again because I knew now that I really liked kids and really wanted to share with kids how important they are. So I looked and looked and looked around for a great place to work, and I found the school I'm working at. I made a resume and I took a deep breath and asked them if I could work there (I really wasn't willing to go just anywhere). And lucky for me, they decided to let me be a teacher again....and so now here I am, spending my days with kids that are great, and I learned that I REALLY love it!

And that's a true story.

I love kids. And I love teaching.

The other day another teacher came into my classroom and took a deep breath and said, "Ah! All is right in my world again now that you're all back." She was being funny. I totally agree with her sentiment! All is right in my world when I get to spend my days with kids in my class.

Yup. All is right in my world.




This is a picture Peirce drew of our family, two years after Destiny was stillborn. I was so touched that he included her in the picture, especially after it had been two years since she was silently born. She always will be a part of our family.

New Year's Eve

Last night we had a great time for New Year's Eve. We made it to midnight for the first time in years.

Allen took Peirce swimming at around 4:30 as the leisure center was having a fun thing for families. Allen's brother and his kids also went. They always have a lot of fun together. There were lots of very cool water toys, watersides and such. I didn't go, and I am glad because swimming makes me so tired.....New Year's Eve is tiring enough for me.

After that we went to a party at a friend's house. There were 3 families and 9 kids....and we only brought one of those kids. We really aren't doing our share to keep up! :)

The kids played games, watched a movie, had a piñata, etc. The adults ate and played Settlers. Took me a while to figure it out. It ended up being quite fun.


The kids totally surprised us. We figured they would make it to around10:30. The oldest two were my son and another boy who are 10, and on down to a 18 month old. All but one of them stayed awake until midnight! We had planned to celebrate New Year's Eve around 10 pm, then go to a party for adults that we had been invited to....but we never got to the second party because no one tuckered out at the first party. At midnight we had noisemakers, stomped on bubble wrap (new idea to me....it was quite fun!), and cheered.....and then went straight home to bed. I don't know if I remember the last time I stayed up until 1:00 am. And it likely won't be until New Year's next year that I do it again.

Peirce sure was tired this morning. Nathan was going down to in Raymond for the day with his kids so they invited Peirce to come. They left at 8:30 am. Nothing like foisting your tired kid on someone else! Hopefully he sleeps in the car.

Halloween

I read a hilarious blog on the rules of Halloween. My family could have written those rules. They live by those rules! They don't know about the extra mask idea though. I wonder if I should bring it up.

Halloween was a lot of fun this year. Peirce invited his friend, Anthony, to go trick or treating. With Anthony comes his sister. They always have a great time. Jill's getting too old, but somehow she still managed to go trick or treating. Allen takes them out and I stay home and hand out candy. We had more trick or treaters this year than we have ever had. I think it was partially because it was really cold. Some parents drove their kids around to people they knew - so I got to see more of our little friends. It was quite fun. I'm always a bit of a party pooper leading up to Halloween - but the night of Halloween is always a good time.

Now, what are we going to do with all this candy??!!

Seminary

We are on Day 2 of our seminary life....only 8 years to go.

Sunday started with a fireside. Jill was excited and nervous. She got to see who her teacher will be (Michael Murray is his name). She got to see who would be in her class, and she got to hang with friends. They had a number of kids bear their testimony, and then the seminary supervisor and the stake president spoke. Both talks were really terrific. President Thomas talked about how important it was for them to invite and remind their friends to get to seminary. He talked about cows and how when you shoot one in a field the rest hardly even flinch. They look over and basically look like they're saying, "Well, talk to you later." and then they just continue on eating their grass. He said they shouldn't be like that with their friends....when they see them in danger they should all rally and help them return to where they should be.

So, now we leave the house at 6:15. Jill gets dropped off at seminary and I get dropped off at school. Man, do I get a lot done in the mornings (I'm even blogging...see!) Morning swims apparently aren't going to start for a few weeks, so daily seminary it is. It's going to be great!

Christmas Eve

We had a wonderful Christmas Eve this year. We started the day off by insuring and registering Allen's new car. YEA!! It took much longer than I anticipated - but everything worked out. Actually, one thing I'm quite pleased about this year is the relaxed feeling I have around Christmas. When school was finished I started in on incorporating FlyLady routines into my day and it seemed like I was comfortably caught up on housework in no time. Phew! I did pretty much all my Christmas shopping this past week (risky, I know!). It seems like Christmas preparations fit into how much time you give them - and that's okay.

This afternoon I broke one of my Christmas resolutions and went to a mall. I was pleasantly surprised though. It wasn't that bad! It was like an average busy Saturday. I didn't even have to drive around the parking lot for 30 minutes trying to find somewhere to park. A Christmas miracle!

We had planned to have the kids go tobaganning today - but it seems we are not having a white Christmas and there definitely wasn't sufficient snow for tobaganning. Nathan and Becky and their kids came over for dinner. It was a great dinner, and great company. After dinner we had planned to sing carols and share favorite Christmas stories - but that didn't end up happening either....and that was okay! Another Christmas miracle: our kids decided to go to bed early so Christmas morning could come quicker. Allen and I spent an hour or so wrapping the last few gifts to be wrapped, filling stockings, and getting breakfast ready for the morning. Christmas morning here we come!

The End

Today is the end of part 1 of my vacation. This week I was off but my darling children were still in school. Oh the things I can accomplish when I am home without them! I have never been as unprepared for Christmas as I was this year. I worried about it but just planned that I would get everything done this week. I worried a little that something would come along to thwart my plan - like sickness....but phew! I have stayed healthy. In the past when school was finished I usually had to spend the first 3 days sleeping. I couldn't do that this time - and luckily didn't need to. Phew!

Today I got to go to an assembly at Peirce's school. It was so fun to see him there. They did a little salsa dance first....every kid in the school was in it! It was great. Then the after school program did a little play, and Kambul Bloxham cut off his hair! He grew it out for cancer patients and today he got it cut off in front of the whole school. He asked kids to come up and cut chunks off - and Peirce even got to be one of them. Quite a lot of fun. They used this as a way to present the virtues for January: caring. It was really great. At the end of the assembly there was a flash mob by the teachers. So fun!! I was so happy to be able to be there. My first assembly at Peirce's new school (this is one of the hazards of going back to work full time). Made me think now and then I should take a personal day to go to their assemblies. Something to seriously consider!

And now our kids are finished school and our Christmas can officially begin. Allen is out trying to find a car today. Here's hoping we can find something in our price range that will allow us to get to Lethbridge for Christmas!